what is easy is sustainable
Probably the first time I formally thought about how to make things easier — not that they should be easier! I’ve had and held that thought often enough over the years — in a range of incarnations/versions of me, all kinds of scenarios where you just know this does not need to be this hard, or you just wish it wasn’t regardless of shoulds, you just wish it was easier.
That experience is deeply familiar and for me, generally begins with a internal growl of WTF?! I own that. But that’s something else, it’s a reaction, intense and verbose at times, for sure, but it’s not formally thinking about how to make things easier. That it was even possible, or you were allowed! - to plan for, prep for ease - that didn’t show up for me until late 2007 when out of the blue I decided to quit smoking —after 26 years of, not just smoking a pack to two packs a day, but feeling quite fine about it.
How I came to want to quit is probably worth exploring too, but for today, for our next living room picnic, what I’d like to explore with you: is how to make things easier. How to cultivate ease for ourselves and for others.
I made it through the experience of quit smoking - which ranged from full-body mindbreakingly hard to endlessly aching and confusing (I was 15 when I started smoking so basically I had been controlling my brain chemistry my entire adult life, so unmoored and foggy barely covers how lost I was inside myself) to almost, almost feeling ok enough to exhale, really exhale and be in my body for a solid two years (no joke, I was broken) —I got through it because I had made it easier on myself going into it.
I know, it doesn’t sound easy and it didn’t feel anything like what I typically imagine when I think of ease. But it was a lesson in how to make things easier.
Ease is a mix of things.
It’s the moment to moment vibe of ooh-nice goodness that makes you want to stay, to continue, to explore and possibly risk.
Ease is the opening that welcomes you.
Ease is relaxation at a cellular level.
It’s others helping you without you even realizing it, much less asking.
Ease is many more things — It’s deep and biologically purposeful.
Ease plays a major role in sanity, integrity, wellbeing and progress.
What is easy is sustainable. And that, my friends, is what I want to picnic on. This aspect of ease as integral to the quality of our lives.
As always, there is nothing to prepare. I’ll share the discussion prompts over the weekend when you register (for those who just like to know what to expect).
What do you think? Is this sounding like your kind of conversation space?
Participating in a living room picnic is a way to join the UNDERMININGnormal community.
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If you’ve never attended a living room picnic and feel like more of an introduction to UNDERMININGnormal and what picnics are like, you can stop by the courtyard; I wrote this for you. To skip to what is a living room picnic…
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UNDERMININGnormal is where deep-thinking, change-seeking women can find community, care and unhurried space for conversations we don’t usually get to have.